Wednesdays…
The day in the week when things suddenly begin to feel possible.
You journey only a mere 48hrs away from Monday and suddenly you feel lighter. Maybe it’s because we know in another 48 we have Friday and for some reason, Friday has been branded as the better day.
Imagine how Monday feels.
I want to make a bad joke but I’m afraid I’ll offend all the Nigerians actually called Monday!
Alas, today I write this entry from the passenger seat of my girls’ car. I don’t know about you but there’s something exhilarating about writing in motion.
The wind in your hair, the trees rushing by, it’s funny how suddenly in these moments your thoughts seem to grow in clarity. The rollercoaster of thoughts, suddenly clinging on for dear life.
For me, these are the best times to think.
Lately, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, but not a lot of moving, so you can imagine how cluttered my mind has been. But one thing I’ve noticed that has continually brought me ounces of joy is that for some reason— even though I hate writing, the idea of escaping my world, to write to you guys has brought about warmth to my chest + right now, it’s the only place where I feel like I’m freely thinking.
Honestly, each entry as you can tell begins with a little ramble as I begin to search my heart, I then take a little picture to capture the moment and begin.
Speaking of moments, here’s the view right now.
but yes, thinking too much has become way too problematic and honestly, I’ve become extremely unproductive.
Today I spent 2 hours overthinking and stressing over a solution to a problem that was simple. My excuse to myself was that I wanted to do it well. I mean I’m the boss, I can’t turn up mediocre… surely?
the truth is I wanted to look the part, I didn’t want to look stupid and well it was all ego.
It’s funny that as I reflect on what I’m writing right now, I realise that I might just be encountering a little recipe to conquer it all.
let’s get into it!
Identifying the problem
I think often we approach areas of our lives with the wrong attitude. Specifically in a social media-perfect world where everyone gets it right on the first try, their idea gets funded or even what they produce goes viral in a moment (or so it seems).
We can often turn up with this pressure of perfection that we think so much, and squeeze all the joy that could be uncovered out of the moment, slowly missing out on the other things that we would encounter.
With everyone becoming famous or seemingly cracking the code immediately, we try to perfect every step, that we structure, plan, learn and never eventually produce. We begin to hoard our thoughts and we say “We’re thinking it through” but all the while we’re just lying to ourselves.
Admit it, you’re just procrastinating.
Now I don’t mean to offend, but really I think sometimes when we say we want to grow, what we’re really saying is that we want people to see us growing, but we don’t actually want to put the work in!
Life has become so much about sensuality that if we don’t feel like it’s happening, then it’s not happening, so we try and control things that don’t need to control, do everything that feeds our ill desire to be seen, end up falsifying movement and eventually to our demise, become gluttonous.
Our goals slowly become aspirations, our aspirations slowly become hesitations and our hesitations eventually become conversations. Eventually, all we can talk about was what could have been.
We all have that one friend that was meant to play in Arsenal but got injured… sigh.
Don’t be them.
And if them is you, then don’t stress.
We can beat this.
How?
I don’t know why you asking me. 😂.
I’m joking.
Over the last 3 days, I’ve noticed that the only way I’ve found myself able to produce anything at all is by deciding to not control what could be, and cultivate or rather exercise the muscle that has to become responsive.
In short, we call this training.
In my days of sprinting, we would train for hours on end, doing the same drills, running the same laps, and practising the same starts, all for one reason…
Readiness.
The only way to activate the muscles and to learn the movements was to do the movement. There was no way around it.
Herein lies lesson 1:
1. Don’t shortcut success or you’ll cut short success.
On other days I would get beaten by my boys so badly that they’d take the mick out of me for weeks on end, and guess what I did? Turn up on the line, run as hard as I can try and out beat them
It created healthy competition, but the problem with competition is that somebody has to win and somebody has to lose + it also increased the risk of injury.
Here in lies lesson 2:
2. Speed is relative, so stay your course
See when you don’t focus on your race, you lose all form trying to move at the speed you see. Then suddenly your hamstring snaps, or most familiar to most— You burn out!
Oh, I hit a nerve? My baddddd.
Lesson 3.
3. Who is it really about?
I’ll keep things short.
Are the things you’re talking about doing important, or just cool?
Are you interested in actually bearing fruit, or do you just want to show people how many branches are there to your tree?
Are you afraid that someone might find you out?
Are they really not ready for you, or are you just afraid?
Is this just about you?
If it is, then maybe you should consider realigning your decisions, desires and heart towards things that actually matter.
Here’s my confession.
This is all for me.
A lot of the things I’ve been doing have been slightly off-axis, and over the last few days of this writing, I’ve had to really consider my motivations, and If I was God, man I would strike my good off the record because honestly a lot of my great deeds have been incredibly selfish.
So on day 3, I’m taking the mask off.
I—just like most people you see, am a fraud in one way or another. I can do better in most of what I do, I’m not as good as I look and I don’t want you to ever feel pressured to emulate the version of things I want you to see.
So calm down, and be where you are, how you are. And cut the overthinking and just do it.
The reality is all the people you fawn over and probably more average than you think, however, they’re relentless and consistent, so they’ll beat you every time, why? —- Well just like in training, when you master the fundamentals, you win not because of how hard you try, but because of how much you’ve trained.
So build the muscle memory, my people, and let go of perfect and consistently average out. There is so much adventure to encounter, so move!
To close up I’ve got some words for you!
Alright, that’s it.
This has been day 3/3. Good luck with following the plot of this write-up, because it changed a thousand times.
Same time tomorrow?
oh yeah, if you want the full conversation then catch up here!
If you missed day 2, then catch up here ⬇️
And maybe share this with a friend!
Every share helps me reach more people, and the more people we reach, the more people we hopefully can impact, so share!
Loved the headline!😊
Omg!!!!!!…. I feel shamed lol 🫣. I turn all my aspirations into conversations of my hesitation - this is me. But not any more, you have summoned my mind to activate and be a willing participant in my hopes and dreams. I hope you and your partner arrived safe at your destination, thank you for bringing us along for the ride. Can’t wait to see what today, some say brings but I say writes 😊